Should I Learn to Scuba Dive Because My Partner Likes It?

I have come across many people who dealt with thisdedicated).
dilemma. As scuba diving is one of those activitiesDo you love the pastime or the person?
that demand a lot of time and money, a keenCamilla was a twenty-something woman, highly
enthusiast is going to devote his/her holidays andeducated. While taking a year-long break from her
spare time to this pursuit. To a non-diver, a diver'scareer doing volunteer work in Central America, she
commitments to his/her sport may seem odd ormet Mark, a man who had made his career as a
obsessive.diving instructor and business owner. Naturally, his
Put straight, a non-diver just doesn't get it. Whyworld revolved around scuba diving and Camilla
would someone spend their weekends going to awanted to get into this world. She learned to dive
quarry or mudflat to get cold and risk an earand her relationship with Mark flourished. Six months
infection? Then there are the vacations, dishing outlater, Camilla and Mark bought a small resort where
for over-weight airline luggage and scheduling all yourshe was consigned to working the shop accounts.
activities around diving.She became disillusioned quickly and less than a year
The question for the non-diving partner: Should youafter opening the shop, demanded out.
get into the sport to have common ground with yourThere are happy accounts. Ron was indifferent after
diving partner?his girlfriend Jade learned to dive while vacationing
Love means never having to say "I'd rather go towith her mother. She really got into diving and was
the mountains this year"spending many Saturdays visiting the stone quarry
A scenario I've seen a lot of these during my timenear their home in England. To Ron, this sounded a
involves a person signing on to an Open Watercomplete waste of time and money until he saw a
course with the "encouragement" of a partner. SadTV documentary on wreck diving in Micronesia. Two
to say, a majority of these are women. The studentweeks later, he was certified and was looking
is unenthusiastic from the beginning. S/he just goesforward to their first dive holiday together. Few
through the most basic requirements of the courseyears later, they are married and spend their holidays
and can't wait for the training day to end. S/he won'tdiving all over the world.
dive much after certification.Ron got into diving because he was besotted with
Another common scenario (and again, typically athe idea of diving NOT because he was besotted by
woman): a partner in a relationship wishes to divehis partner. Lucky for him now, his partner shares his
because his/her partner is a keen diver. The livingpastime.
vicariously principle is at work here. S/he may notJust DO IT but do it for the right reasons
really have thought of what scuba diving entails but isThink about it hard if you're thinking of taking up
convinced that it'll be wonderful spending weekendsdiving. Is it YOUR initiative, your interest? And this
or holidays together.applies to many other activities, not just scuba diving.
Yes it's nice to have a common interest but is itAs for divers, do you really want a reluctant dive
really your thing? This is worth asking because scubabuddy? Do you think your partner is going to like a
diving can require commitments on funds and timepastime just because you do? Like any activity, the
and have a bearing on holiday choices (and evenenthusiasts often suffer from tunnel vision. Really,
have a bearing on where to live for the mostsome things and some people are best left at home.